“The first time i met Tsubomi was when i was twenty. Satsuki Shishio, 20 years old, currently in college. I don’t personally like my name but.. i thought the name she said sounded a little nice. Tsubomi was like a jack-in-the-box. Many unexpected things happened. She was a photographer and was clever with words, but the next moment, she was a drunkard sleeping on the streets. Sometimes she was like a guy friend and i liked the Tsubomi that was sometimes like an innocent girl, as well. About two years after we started going out..(Tsubomi is leaving the country for 2-3 years).. i couldn’t say anything else because it was so sudden. I received a letter from Tsubomi without an address. Written in it was “After thinking about it, i think that s should go our separate ways.” It was a short, one page break up letter. One week after that, i realized it had already been two years… since Tsubomi left.
I thought it was a dream. One that i’ve been longing for two years now. If Tsubomi came back and appeared in front of my eyes, i wanted to tell her the words i couldn’t tell her back then.
Tell her. This is weird. I even dreamt about this, but the words aren’t coming out. Even though she’s this close to me. Even though she’s this close… why…does she feel so.. far away? Ah, i see. I was, at that time, just like that too. I should have told her my feelings properly.
"I will be waiting for you, Tsubomi. The words that i couldn’t tell Tsubomi didn’t have any meaning in them… and they have long since disappeared from myself.
"I can’t think of you like i did in the past. Both of us probably don’t have any more feelings for each other, but i just didn’t realize it this whole time."
Words and feelings are alive and the things that i’ve been longing or were nothing but dreams. The wounds from that time have already become scabs and two years were more than enough to make me realize that. As i thought, i still like the name that Tsubomi says.
Finding one true friend was a lot harder than finding hundred boyfriends..